It's Not Over Tonight
by dangerousanimals
Summary: Set in the second half of season four. Serena leaves again and Dan moves on with Blair...  Dair/Derena


**A/N- Okay so this is my first time writing DB, so let's see how it goes . . . **

**This is set in season four after _"The Townie"_. Serena is one of my favourite characters but she annoys the hell out of me especially when she screws up DS. **

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Dan thought he was mad at Serena. It would've made sense if he was, it would've been easier. But no, he was past mad. He could never be mad with her he'd decided. But this – _this _feeling – was disappointment. And it hurt like hell. Finally he had thought that he and Serena could get it together. She had chosen him and he had believed in her when no one else had. Maybe he should've predicted it when she returned to the city with Ben. Maybe he should've prepared himself for this feeling. But no, it hit him like a punch when he saw the both of them together, when she brought him over for breakfast, when he introduced him to everyone like another one of her stupid and less than temporary boyfriends.

This was almost four months ago now; he wasn't sure if he'd gotten over it or if he'd pushed it into the back of his mind but he'd moved on (to a different continent no less). Yet he still had feelings for her. Such messed up and convoluted feelings, he wasn't sure he loved her or hated her. She had tossed him aside as if he had meant absolutely nothing to her.

Dan sat, near-oblivious to his surroundings evaluating everything has led to him being here. If you had asked him who'd he been dating later this year he never would've guessed Blair Waldorf. They were a lot like each other he came to find. When he kissed her, he couldn't remember what he had to do that day and when she whispered into his ear – her breath hot and heavy, when she dug her nails into his back; there was no one else he wanted more. Before soon he felt himself falling for the smart, sexy brunette that made fun of his hair and his messy writing before kissing his neck and pulling him toward her bed. Sometimes, _most_ of the time, he could've said he loved her.

She sat on his lap, playing with the collar of his shirt in the Waldorf penthouse. Tonight Eleanor was launching her new collection which required a soiree, champagne and fifty or so people that Dan had never met before. Lily and Rufus walked toward where they were sitting and sat across from them.

"Blair, Dan," she greeted, smiling at them both. Her blonde hair pulled back into her signature bun, her head held high. Dan looked to his father, who was hiding whatever discomfort he may have been feeling and looked all the more relaxed than he usually did at these sort of things.

"Hi Mrs Van – I mean Lily," Blair started before quickly correcting herself.

"We were just wondering if either of you had heard anything from Serena," Rufus chimed in. Dan noticed Blair dropped her eyes, her posture sinking a little. He knew he wasn't the only one hurting over Serena but they never talked about her.

"Not since she left," he watched her lips move as she spoke; the vulnerability in her voice surprised him like it always did. She'd hide behind her walls letting them slip for a moment or so and the next minute all trace of it would be gone.

"But she's all alright isn't she?" There was a hint of anxiety in Lily's voice but it was dangerously low for a mother who hadn't heard from her daughter in four months, irritation seeped through his self control. Her flippant attitude towards Serena always managed to annoy him. Truth was Dan _had_ heard from Serena but he wasn't about to share that information. She had written him a letter; the stamps indicated Europe and the paper smelt like her perfume. He found himself tuning out once again (Blair had seamlessly switched the topic of conversation).

It had been almost three weeks since she'd left after texting him with the ambiguous "I'm leaving," he and Blair had just started hanging out more often. He'd walked around the loft turning it over and over in his hands for what felt like forever, before finally opening it.

_Dan,_

_I want you to know that I truly am sorry for leaving the city, for leaving you. But I meant what I said, I chose you, no matter what happens between us it will always be you and I need to you believe me and trust me when I say that this is for the best._

_I can't say when I'll be back, don't wait for me._

_Someday it will be our time again. I love you,_

_S._

A paragraph was all he got. A paragraph; short and bittersweet. After walking around for days with it in his pocket, he went out into the fire escape and set fire to it. Watching the flames consume it until it had turned to ash, crumpled and darkened. He turned on his heel and walked back into his room. The words etched into his thoughts.

"Dan. Dan," Blair's voice brought him back to the present, he looked into her big brown and smiled before kissing her cheek. She leant in closer, whispering in his ear "Let's go up to my room,"

Before he could reply she was already leading him towards the stairs by the hand but he caught her by the waist and pulled her close.

"Always in charge," he murmured softly so only she could hear.

"_Always_ Humphrey,"

He'd barely shut the door behind them before she pushed him up against the wall, kissing him deeply; one hand in his hair, the other pushing up his shirt sliding over his stomach. Wasting no time Dan grabbed her dress and in one fluid motion pulled it over her head and tossed it aside. He pulled her closer, exploring her body. Their lips met again and this time he took charge, walking her backwards toward her bed. They toppled onto it and she laughed in his ear. She straddled him and took off his shirt leaving kisses from his chest to his jaw as she did.

"C'mon Humphrey, what are you waiting for?" she sat up again starting to undo the buckle of his belt. His hands tracing circles up and down her thighs, a moan escaping her –

"B?" a familiar voice came from the door making Dan sit up with Blair still on his lap, she wrapped her arms around his neck. The door swung open and the source of the voice stepped inside.

Serena.

She flicked on the light but it took her a while to actually absorb what she'd walked in on. When she did, she didn't move, neither did Dan or Blair. They looked from one another, Dan taking in every aspect of Blair in her black lingerie - her cheeks flushed and a scowl across her perfect features after being interrupted - and he tried to stop himself up he couldn't help looking at Serena, _really_ looking. After all, he hadn't seen her in four months. She looked happier than she'd ever been (or than he'd ever seen her), her hair was longer now, almost as long as it was when they were juniors, it curled around her arms almost at her elbows, made even brighter by the jet black dress she was wearing.

Both of them in black, both of them beautiful in their own ways and both of them he loved.

"Serena. Do you mind? We were kind of busy," her voice more harsh than Dan had witnessed in years. He'd forgotten how cruel she could be.

"I'm sorry I was – I'm just going to leave," she mumbled before exiting the room. Dan set Blair aside and stood up, running his hands threw his hair.

"So what Dan? This is it? She's back now and you're just going to go running back to her?" anger filled her voice but her eyes betrayed how hurt she was.

"Of course not, you deserve someone who will always be there for you, someone who will always put you first." He walked over to where she sat on the bed, holding her face in his hands. "Blair, look at me." She sighed but finally looked up. Her brown eyes filled with tears.

"She always gets everything. She always comes out on top. No matter what she does, she's the one that everyone forgives and the one that _everyone_ loves." Tears began to stream down her face. "I can never compete with that."

"Blair, you are amazing. And I love you, I do. But you can't expect me to tell you that I don't love her anymore. The difference is, I want to be with you. Not her, you."

"Really?" her voice small as if shocked by his confession. He wiped away her tears and leant down again to press his lips to hers.

A week had passed since their encounter with Serena. Blair hadn't spoken a word to her and neither had Dan. They went to school; they went out for dinner and tried to avoid any encounters with her if they could. That was until she sent him a text message, asking if they could talk.

He and Blair were studying when he felt his phone go off in his pocket, Blair looked up at him.

_Can you meet me? I'm at home. - S_

Blair guessed who it was from as he read.

"Talk to her. If you meant what you said, you'll come back."

"I did, and I will."

He left his girlfriend and went to meet the girl he was still irrevocably in love with . . . Or not, he couldn't be sure.

When he stepped out of the elevator still unsure of what to do or say, the air conditioning providing little relief. He headed straight for Serena's room.

"Dan hi, what are you doing here?" Lily stepped out of the kitchen to kiss him on the cheek. Considering it was almost eleven o'clock she was surprised, but not unhappy. She smiled and put a hand to her hip.

"I'm here to see Serena actually,"

"Good! Maybe you can find out what's wrong with her. She's been moping around ever since she came back." She said, shaking her head, "and she won't tell me anything."

"Yeah well, I'll try."

He continued on finally stopping in front of her door, knocking softly before pushing it open slowly. She was pacing, back and forth, wringing her hands together like she usually did when something was bothering her. She heard him and turned.

"Dan, I heard you talking to my mom. I wanted to see you, being away for that long and seeing you or hearing your voice . . . I-"

"Serena, what do you want from me?" he interrupted, annoyed. She grew quiet and stopped pacing. The confidence she had that night at the Waldorf's had dimmed a little. She sat on the edge of the bed, and sighed.

"I want you," she looked up at him again, tears filling her eyes. Dan didn't know how to reply to something like that, he was sympathetic but at the same time frustrated. Silence obviously wasn't what she wanted. She stood and turned her back to him, looking out the window.

"You can't keep doing this to me," he mumbled but loud enough for her to hear apparently. She whipped around, if looks could kill . . .

"Doing what Dan? Wanting you? _Loving_ you?"

"You've always had me. Always, and sometimes you let me think I have you too. I was ready to fly to Paris for you and you took two months to choose between Nate and me. And then in November I was the only who believed in you, and two weeks later you came back to New York with Ben." Dan couldn't stop himself now; everything he'd been holding on to came pouring out.

"You didn't have to move on with _my_ best friend."

"You didn't have to leave for four months! That's beside the point Serena. You have no right to be angry with me and don't blame this on Blair either. She knows what she wants and who she wants to be with." he felt his voice quiver, his anger began to fade.

"I did mean what I said in that letter you know." Her voice soft, she was looking at her feet again.

It was then, Dan got his answer. He loved her, he always will. But he couldn't do this again, not now. He walked toward her and took her hand in his, brushing her hair from her face with the other.

"Someday it'll be our time again. But not now," he murmured. He turned to leave but she kept hold of his hand.

"Do you love her?"

"I do," he hesitated for a split second but the words were true. He turned to leave again and this time she let him go. As he closed the door behind him he looked back. She stood rooted to the spot, her cheeks glistening with tears in the dim light.

He kept walking.

On the way back to Blair's he took out his phone and opened a new text message. Before he realised what he was intending on doing he'd typed;

_I still love you Serena, don't ever think that I don't._

But instead of pressing send he deleted what he wrote and put his phone back into his pocket. He returned back to the Waldorf's and crawled into bed with his girlfriend. Nowhere else he wanted to be and no one else he wanted to be with.

_fin._

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**review? :)**


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